A new journey will begin

Assalamualaikum...

Sudah lama ku biarkan belog ini tidak ber update. Lepas final exam ari tu tambah pulak kesibukan menyiapkan paper research di kampung, feeling untuk mengupdate entri baru tetiba hambar. Bukan setakat malas nak update entri, segala-galanya rasa tawar sekali untuk memulakan sesuatu. Reasonnya? Allah sahaja yang tahu. Then bila datang sini balik, dengan semangat yang kononnya berkobar-kobar nak melapor diri sebagai kaunselor pelatih di sebuah sekolah kt KL ni, tetiba dapat berita semua sekolah di KL tutup. Jerebu punya pasaii. Huhu.. Takpa, maybe Allah mahu menenangkan perasaan aku yang sedang bergelora ni saat ini terlebih dahulu sebelum aku memulakan langkah aku untuk memulakan internship kat situ.

Jerebu di IIUM. Gambar ni aku ambik from FB sorang lecturer AIKOL. Lihat lah betapa teruknya jerebu kat sini. Aku dah mula sakit tekak. Dah mula rasa berpinar-pinar. What I suppose to do? Uhukk. Btw jom sama2 doakan semoga jerebu ni cepat berakhir. Ini mungkin satu petanda yang Allah hendak sampaikan tentang sesuatu. Mungkin kita boleh belajar sesuatu perkara penting. Perkara tersembunyi yang akan kita ketahui bila satu masa ditetapkan.

Thinking of new journey on what my life will be. Jadi  seorang kaunselor pelatih ni bukan mudah. Menuntut semangat dan kesabaran yang tinggi. Bila dengar je pengalaman mereka2 yang dah buat internship sebelum ni, terbayang betapa susahnya diorang kena survive. Walaupun dulu kami sudah didedahkan dengan praktikum yang lebih kurang sama je dengan internship ni cuma contact hour je berbeza, tapi internship kali ni jauh lebih mencabar. Jauh lebih panjang contact hour kat sekolah dan kebarangkalian untuk kami berdepan dengan masalah pentadbiran seperti orang lain jugak adalah tinggi. Expectation diorang terhadap kami2 ni, kadang2 rasa macam dibuli dan diperkecilkan jugak mungkin wujud. Tapi ni lah pengalaman 'manis' yang akan kami tempuhi sebelum memasuki dunia pekerjaan aka World of Work. May Allah ease.

Sedikit catitan yang aku buat masa praktikum dulu untuk diserahkan kepada supervisor. Godek-godek balik folder praktikum tetiba terjumpa diari pendek nih. Sebenarnya setiap minggu kena buat reflection tentang semua nih cuma yang ni adalah overall tentang pengalaman kami yang perlu ditulis secara ringkas. Sweet sangat bila ingat balik betapa manis dan pahitnya pengalaman kami masa praktikum tahun lepas.

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Diary as a practicum counselor

Becoming a practicum counselor really taught me several important things about how wonderful life is about. I enjoyed mingle with students and teachers at here. Although I got difficulties in adapting new environment at first glance, after few weeks my heart whispered like I do not want to study at campus anymore. I fell in love with environment at school. Updating logbook and waiting students at fence during assembly session daily were among my sweet routines at that school. I could see various face expression when those who come late were ‘invited’ to counseling room, but mostly they will give cooperation to me after that and also they were entitled to proceed to the next counseling session or not.

Other than that if I did not have any appointment with students at one whole day, my life is like on zero. I love the moment when students came into me and share their stories with me.  Building rapport with them is crucial so that we can have warm relationship and create trust atmosphere to one another. They were so close to me and refuse to let me go from that school. This was troublesome as I must play my role to make them less dependent to me.

I also was given chance to decorate the counseling room with PRSian’s help. They were willing to beautify the room, clean the dust and paste on the posters and motivational cards at the wall. At the same day also I will find my time to observe the school’s compound and watch student’s behavior. Some of them smile at me and some of them look weird in me because of my physical appearance. It’s somehow become a funny moment because they got shocked with me and at last they were grinning as if I was not a teacher at that school. But for me it’s much more better actually. At least they will not treat me as a teacher and thus we can befriend and break the chains that bind us.

Dealing with problematic students out of my expectation also gave me real challenges indeed. One time when I listen to their story, I got mild fever after that. Prior to this, I became neutral with all of these but at that time being, my brain became clueless. But then I realize that this is part of tough experience that I must confront, no matter who they are. They are among people who need to be guided, not to be left behind. They have right to be treated equally. I must accept and welcome them unconditionally.

By:  Farihah Mohamad 091****

Semoga internship kali ni membawa kami kepada pengalaman dan cabaran sebenar sebagai seorang guru. Bukan mudah nak menjadi seorang guru nih. Banyak pahitnya, tapi manisnya tetap ada. Wahai jerebu, cepat-cepatlah kamu berlalu pergi. Kalau boleh pergi lah jauh-jauh sampai ke planet pluto sekalipun. Kami sudah sedia berkhidmat kepada nusa bangsa nih hehehe =P

Wish me all the best! #nervous #excitedbuthappy